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Campaign Speech - Eminem.lrc
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[00:00.01]Jumped out of the 2 nd floor of a record store[00:02.75]With a treacherous four cassette and a cassette recorder[00:05.69]In Ecuador with Edward Norton[00:08.19]Witness the metamorphosis[00:09.45]Of a legend growing like an expert swordsman[00:11.83]From the hessian war and[00:13.01]Hence the origin of the headless horseman[00:15.05]Born with the endorphins of a pathetic orphan[00:18.13]Endless source and reservoir[00:20.62]Of extension cords in dresser drawers[00:22.21]And deadbolts on the bedroom doors[00:24.03]And sexual torture kits kept in a separate storage bin[00:26.85]Excellent boyfriend[00:28.65]Use intercourse to settle scores[00:30.27]With women who have been vendettas towards men[00:32.11]Shithead is forced in 'til there's shredded foreskin[00:35.02]Reddish torn and they're only being fed a portion[00:37.70]Bed sores and sore shins[00:39.12]Pregnant whores can get abortions[00:40.79]Fetish for sticking metal forks in self absorption[00:43.49]Skeletor I went to hell and fell a floor[00:45.74]A predator I'm headed for competitors[00:48.00]Better warn 'em what I lack in tact and a set of morals[00:50.78]I make up for in metaphors like a cosmetic store[00:54.55]Stegosaurus chuck norris with a thesaurus[00:57.27]Yes of course a mess of warrants[00:59.00]You want some come and get some boys[01:00.61]I'm giving daniel pantaleo a refresher course[01:03.35]On excessive force and pressure points[01:05.42]And dressing george zimmerman in a fluorescent orange[01:07.72]Dress and four inch heels to address the court[01:09.94]With a bullseye on his back his whole chest and torso[01:12.18]Or left on the doorsteps of trayvon's dad as a present for him[01:17.28]In my present form I'm desert storm[01:19.42]Appetite for destruction there's no suppressant for[01:22.50]Aggressive forceful and less remorseful in every morsel[01:24.99]Unpleasant horrible hello gorgeous[01:27.08]The rebel with devil horns just fell off the yellow short bus[01:31.02]Met a contortionist said when you wanna get sexual[01:34.32]She said however I fit in your schedule I'm flexible[01:37.96]Expired tags on the saturn got catherine bach[01:40.43]In the back in daisy dukes with the hazards on[01:43.66]At a traffic stop getting harassed sign an autograph[01:46.38]For this ****ing cop's daughter[01:48.00]Laugh 'cause I called her a brat on it[01:50.16]He spat on it and brought it back looking half in shock[01:53.05]Had a heart attack and dropped dead[01:54.86]Started falling back with it[01:56.30]And got slapped with a colin kaepernick practice sock[01:59.94]One ball and half a ****ing apple watch[02:02.99]Crack front axle walked in a bass pro shop with david hasselhoff[02:06.78]Pulled tabasco sauce out of my satchel[02:08.79]Knocked over a fisherman's tackle box and[02:12.27]Asked if they had a laughing stock[02:15.15]That was ****ing stupid[02:17.14]You got it twisted all 'cause I offered this bitch[02:19.77]A doggie biscuit you call me misogynistic[02:22.77]Bitch get to massaging this dick[02:24.51]Like spas in this bitch slob on it with gobs of lipstick[02:28.36]Got a shopping list for you to run some odds and ends with[02:31.42]It's not a bitch on this earth I can be monogamous with[02:34.38]She's non existent[02:36.15]Robin Thicke with a throbbing dick on some suave and slick shit[02:39.66]But I shout derogatives at niggas like ****ing missile launches[02:42.97]Misfit blond and nitwit[02:44.55]Like I've gone ballistic with a frosting tip kit[02:47.26]Screamed I hate blondes and became one I'm optimistic[02:51.68]Love to start shit[02:52.97]Shoving clark kent's undergarments in the glove compartment[02:55.85]Of the bucket bumping bubba sparxxx[02:57.84]I'm double parking up at targets trouble 'causer a double crosser[03:01.40]Shadiest mother****er you'll ever come acros[03:03.67]Olympic gymnast been known for some assaults[03:06.80]A couple lawsuits enough to cause a stomach ulcer[03:09.62]Same damn brain scan results as rainman's is[03:12.53]Something's off but when dusting hoffman's[03:14.71]Dressing up in your mummy costume[03:16.26]On stage dancing to brain damage what's the problem[03:19.12]Nothing's wrong the name brand is back to reclaim status[03:22.97]Run the faucet I'ma dunk[03:24.24]A bunch of trump supporters underwater[03:25.84]Snuck up on 'em in ray bans in a gray van with a spray tan[03:29.31]It's a wrap like an ace bandage[03:30.97]Don't give a **** persona to my last DNA stran[03:34.62]E j in the waistband at the vmas with the stagehand[03:38.20]She wants kielbasa pre arrange an escape plan[03:41.28]Three inch blade on point like a see and say[03:44.01]Consider me a dangerous man[03:45.80]But you should be afraid of this dang candidate[03:49.05]You say trump don't kiss ass like a puppet[03:51.45]'Cause he runs his campaign with his own cash for the fundin'[03:54.40]And that's what you wanted[03:55.63]A ****ing loose cannon who's blunt with his hand on the button[03:58.22]Who doesn't have to answer to no one great idea[04:02.55]If I was president[04:04.58]Getting off is the first order of business[04:07.66]Once I get in office[04:09.56]Second thing that'll make me happy's walking up to uncle sam[04:13.13]Naked laughing **** cupped in hand[04:15.39]Screaming **** safe ass[04:16.73]Throw a latex and an aids test at him[04:18.69]Tell congress I run this land[04:20.63]And I want the rubber banned and make it snappy[04:24.33]Addiction to friction and static[04:26.04]Addict who can't escape the habit[04:27.72]Continue to chase the dragon[04:29.23]But as fate would have it I walked up in major magics[04:32.26]Dressed as the maintenance man[04:33.92]In a laser tag vest and a racing jacket[04:36.31]With a gauge to blast it[04:37.53]And sped away in the station wagon[04:39.64]Stacey dash's and casey anthony's[04:41.69]Crazy asses in the backseat[04:43.33]Throwing stayfree pads at me[04:45.32]Dead passenger in the passenger seat[04:47.41]Unfasten the safety latches[04:48.74]And slam on the brakes in traffic so hard[04:51.15]I snapped the relocation brackets for the monster tires[04:53.96]'Finna get a murder case and catch it[04:55.76]Like you threw it at me encased in plastic[04:59.13]And send dylan roof through the windshield of the benz[05:01.38]Until he spins like a pinwheel and begins feeling[05:03.53]Like a windmiller with a thin build while his skin's peeling[05:06.43]And skids 'til he hits a cement pillar[05:08.34]Swing for the fence like prince fielder[05:10.05]Knock it into the upper peninsula[05:11.62]You wanna go against 'zilla the rap god[05:13.87]When will I quit never been realer[05:15.62]The in stiller of fear not even a scintilla of doubt[05:18.35]Whose pens iller than prince in a chinchilla[05:19.93]Or ben stiller in a suspense thriller[05:22.20]Revenge killer avenge syllable binge[05:24.13]Fill a syringe 'til I[05:25.78]Draw first blood[05:27.34]Even pop shit on my pop shit and it's popular[05:30.73]Couldn't be more awkwarder[05:32.35]Cause you're innocence I robbed you of[05:33.99]It's my fingers that got stuck up[05:35.83]Taught ya ta not give a[05:37.61]Slapstick hockey puck[05:39.47]The broad hunter with the sawed off[05:41.01]Like an arm when it's lopped off of ya[05:42.50]But I'm not gonna get the shotgun[05:44.06]Or the glock I'm gonna opt for the ox[05:45.86]Cause I'm into o**ects that are sharp when I shop[05:48.22]And it's not a shock I'm such an obnoxious mother****e[05:49.79]The rock hudson of rock 'cause who would have thought[05:51.56]This much of a ********** to go across the buttocks of[05:53.63]Vivica fox with a box cutter[05:57.13]That was for 50 little slap on the wrist be warned[05:59.74]I'm unrevealing quickly[06:01.08]My squabbles I'm grappling with your time traveling with me[06:04.66]Try and follow as I wobble relapse into history with a flask of the whiskey[06:09.45]Tip it back then I'm twisting wine bottles[06:12.30]Like what happened to Chris reeves' spine column[06:15.40]That's the plan of attack when I'm fixing my problems[06:18.51]Wish my chest wasn't having to get these rhymes off 'em[06:21.35]But the fact that I have so many rappers against me mind boggles[06:24.57]And why I haven't come back on these niggas who diss me is[06:27.13]More of a spectacular mystery than a ****ing Agatha Christie crime novel[06:32.25]But my patience is wearing thin[06:33.94]Swear I been contemplating rubbing shit in your face 'til I smear it i[06:37.47]Diss you in every lyric until you fear the pen[06:39.81]And never appear again[06:41.23]If you actually had ****ing careers to en[06:44.77]But then I think of molly qerim and I steer 'em in that direction[06:47.98]And forget my ideas for them[06:51.05]Molly I'm gone off you[06:52.64]Man light some kush[06:54.19]You're my first take I'll nail you[06:56.09]Can't lie I gush[06:57.63]If I won you over you would be the grand prize[06:59.92]I'm entranced by your looks come and give the shady franchise a push[07:03.95]You can get it in the can like some anheuser busch[07:07.11]Jeans too small least three pant sizes tush[07:09.66]Mushed against your damn side your puss[07:11.64]And thighs are squished[07:13.50]What kind of attires that[07:15.15]I'm ready to be rode[07:16.52]Psychopath bet you we'll get it popping like a flat[07:20.43]Light the match to ignite the wrath[07:22.21]Got knives to slash and slice hermaphrodites in half[07:25.24]Piper chapmans might just have to picket me[07:28.37]Like a scab[07:30.29]Hard to describe in fact[07:31.69]Startling violent perhaps[07:33.02]Are things that come to mind as soon as I start spitting rhymes like that[07:36.44]And you aren't really surprised at that[07:38.25]But as far as these lines I rap[07:39.78]And these bars wouldn't dial it back if I star 69 ed the track[07:44.61]Why am I such a ****
text lyrics
Jumped out of the 2 nd floor of a record storeWith a treacherous four cassette and a cassette recorderIn Ecuador with Edward NortonWitness the metamorphosisOf a legend growing like an expert swordsmanFrom the hessian war andHence the origin of the headless horsemanBorn with the endorphins of a pathetic orphanEndless source and reservoirOf extension cords in dresser drawersAnd deadbolts on the bedroom doorsAnd sexual torture kits kept in a separate storage binExcellent boyfriendUse intercourse to settle scoresWith women who have been vendettas towards menShithead is forced in 'til there's shredded foreskinReddish torn and they're only being fed a portionBed sores and sore shinsPregnant whores can get abortionsFetish for sticking metal forks in self absorptionSkeletor I went to hell and fell a floorA predator I'm headed for competitorsBetter warn 'em what I lack in tact and a set of moralsI make up for in metaphors like a cosmetic storeStegosaurus chuck norris with a thesaurusYes of course a mess of warrantsYou want some come and get some boysI'm giving daniel pantaleo a refresher courseOn excessive force and pressure pointsAnd dressing george zimmerman in a fluorescent orangeDress and four inch heels to address the courtWith a bullseye on his back his whole chest and torsoOr left on the doorsteps of trayvon's dad as a present for himIn my present form I'm desert stormAppetite for destruction there's no suppressant forAggressive forceful and less remorseful in every morselUnpleasant horrible hello gorgeousThe rebel with devil horns just fell off the yellow short busMet a contortionist said when you wanna get sexualShe said however I fit in your schedule I'm flexibleExpired tags on the saturn got catherine bachIn the back in daisy dukes with the hazards onAt a traffic stop getting harassed sign an autographFor this ****ing cop's daughterLaugh 'cause I called her a brat on itHe spat on it and brought it back looking half in shockHad a heart attack and dropped deadStarted falling back with itAnd got slapped with a colin kaepernick practice sockOne ball and half a ****ing apple watchCrack front axle walked in a bass pro shop with david hasselhoffPulled tabasco sauce out of my satchelKnocked over a fisherman's tackle box andAsked if they had a laughing stockThat was ****ing stupidYou got it twisted all 'cause I offered this bitchA doggie biscuit you call me misogynisticBitch get to massaging this dickLike spas in this bitch slob on it with gobs of lipstickGot a shopping list for you to run some odds and ends withIt's not a bitch on this earth I can be monogamous withShe's non existentRobin Thicke with a throbbing dick on some suave and slick shitBut I shout derogatives at niggas like ****ing missile launchesMisfit blond and nitwitLike I've gone ballistic with a frosting tip kitScreamed I hate blondes and became one I'm optimisticLove to start shitShoving clark kent's undergarments in the glove compartmentOf the bucket bumping bubba sparxxxI'm double parking up at targets trouble 'causer a double crosserShadiest mother****er you'll ever come acrosOlympic gymnast been known for some assaultsA couple lawsuits enough to cause a stomach ulcerSame damn brain scan results as rainman's isSomething's off but when dusting hoffman'sDressing up in your mummy costumeOn stage dancing to brain damage what's the problemNothing's wrong the name brand is back to reclaim statusRun the faucet I'ma dunkA bunch of trump supporters underwaterSnuck up on 'em in ray bans in a gray van with a spray tanIt's a wrap like an ace bandageDon't give a **** persona to my last DNA stranE j in the waistband at the vmas with the stagehandShe wants kielbasa pre arrange an escape planThree inch blade on point like a see and sayConsider me a dangerous manBut you should be afraid of this dang candidateYou say trump don't kiss ass like a puppet'Cause he runs his campaign with his own cash for the fundin'And that's what you wantedA ****ing loose cannon who's blunt with his hand on the buttonWho doesn't have to answer to no one great ideaIf I was presidentGetting off is the first order of businessOnce I get in officeSecond thing that'll make me happy's walking up to uncle samNaked laughing **** cupped in handScreaming **** safe assThrow a latex and an aids test at himTell congress I run this landAnd I want the rubber banned and make it snappyAddiction to friction and staticAddict who can't escape the habitContinue to chase the dragonBut as fate would have it I walked up in major magicsDressed as the maintenance manIn a laser tag vest and a racing jacketWith a gauge to blast itAnd sped away in the station wagonStacey dash's and casey anthony'sCrazy asses in the backseatThrowing stayfree pads at meDead passenger in the passenger seatUnfasten the safety latchesAnd slam on the brakes in traffic so hardI snapped the relocation brackets for the monster tires'Finna get a murder case and catch itLike you threw it at me encased in plasticAnd send dylan roof through the windshield of the benzUntil he spins like a pinwheel and begins feelingLike a windmiller with a thin build while his skin's peelingAnd skids 'til he hits a cement pillarSwing for the fence like prince fielderKnock it into the upper peninsulaYou wanna go against 'zilla the rap godWhen will I quit never been realerThe in stiller of fear not even a scintilla of doubtWhose pens iller than prince in a chinchillaOr ben stiller in a suspense thrillerRevenge killer avenge syllable bingeFill a syringe 'til IDraw first bloodEven pop shit on my pop shit and it's popularCouldn't be more awkwarderCause you're innocence I robbed you ofIt's my fingers that got stuck upTaught ya ta not give aSlapstick hockey puckThe broad hunter with the sawed offLike an arm when it's lopped off of yaBut I'm not gonna get the shotgunOr the glock I'm gonna opt for the oxCause I'm into o**ects that are sharp when I shopAnd it's not a shock I'm such an obnoxious mother****eThe rock hudson of rock 'cause who would have thoughtThis much of a ********** to go across the buttocks ofVivica fox with a box cutterThat was for 50 little slap on the wrist be warnedI'm unrevealing quicklyMy squabbles I'm grappling with your time traveling with meTry and follow as I wobble relapse into history with a flask of the whiskeyTip it back then I'm twisting wine bottlesLike what happened to Chris reeves' spine columnThat's the plan of attack when I'm fixing my problemsWish my chest wasn't having to get these rhymes off 'emBut the fact that I have so many rappers against me mind bogglesAnd why I haven't come back on these niggas who diss me isMore of a spectacular mystery than a ****ing Agatha Christie crime novelBut my patience is wearing thinSwear I been contemplating rubbing shit in your face 'til I smear it iDiss you in every lyric until you fear the penAnd never appear againIf you actually had ****ing careers to enBut then I think of molly qerim and I steer 'em in that directionAnd forget my ideas for themMolly I'm gone off youMan light some kushYou're my first take I'll nail youCan't lie I gushIf I won you over you would be the grand prizeI'm entranced by your looks come and give the shady franchise a pushYou can get it in the can like some anheuser buschJeans too small least three pant sizes tushMushed against your damn side your pussAnd thighs are squishedWhat kind of attires thatI'm ready to be rodePsychopath bet you we'll get it popping like a flatLight the match to ignite the wrathGot knives to slash and slice hermaphrodites in halfPiper chapmans might just have to picket meLike a scabHard to describe in factStartling violent perhapsAre things that come to mind as soon as I start spitting rhymes like thatAnd you aren't really surprised at thatBut as far as these lines I rapAnd these bars wouldn't dial it back if I star 69 ed the trackWhy am I such a ****
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